This is the ad I’m placing in some local online classifieds as well as on craigslist.
Terrific Water Tank Trailer for Trade
I’m looking to trade this water tank trailer for something else. Something I want more than this tank. I’m not sure yet what would be, so go ahead and make me an offer.
About the trailer: this trailer has a big water tank on it. At one point, the tank held propane, however since that time a tap has been drilled and it’s been filled with water. As such it will no longer hold propane. Note the hitch type. You’ll need one of those hook trailer hitches to take it home with you.
As you can see in the pictures, the tank has been much used and well loved and is no longer in new condition.The tires hold air. They were put on new when the tank was purchased a couple of years ago. I have them back on the rim and pumped up, and as soon as I find my phone, Ill swap out the pictures.
* Put a leaky hose on it and drip irrigate your tomatoes all day long with warm water for a week, probably more.
* Tow it behind a jeep or something in a parade. Get all the kids in your neighborhood to walk behind it, filling their squirt guns on the fly so they can hose down parade watchers. You will be the most loved AND hated person in the parade.
* Hold cleanup water to make any location a possible scout camp.
* Put your keys in. That way you’ll always know where to find them.
* If you’re good with welding and torch cutting, you could cut into this sucker and make a truly epic mobile grill / smoker. You would be invited to all the cool parties. Bonus points if you coat it with heat resistant pink paint so that it resembles a pig.
* Use as cover during a firefight.
* Speaking of fire, you could paint it red and pretend it’s a fire truck.
* Fill with candy to make the world’s most extreme pinata.
I suppose I might accept a cash offer, but I’d really rather trade for something. Especially something interesting.
This is the beginning of an experiment wherein my father and I are going to make 20 total trades to see what we end up with. We suspect this process may take a while. If anything amusing happens with this, I’ll let you know.
What are three things about you that you want everybody to know?
1. My interest in writing a novel started late in life, when I was in my 40′s, as I resisted putting words to paper for the longest time. Only when I realized that I enjoyed telling stories did I think about creating a book as an outlet to the stories that I wanted to tell.
2. I don’t lead a very interesting life and nothing truly exciting ever happens to me, so a lot of what I like to write about are adventures that I wish I could have.
3. I hope to someday be rich and famous so that I can quit my day job and devote 100% of my free time to travelling the world, visiting the places that I have only read about or seen on TV.
What is one thing about you that almost nobody knows?
1. I would love to be a NASCAR driver!
Let’s say you sell a million copies of your book tomorrow. Where’s the first place you visit?
While this is a tough question to answer, my first choice would be to go on a Mediterranean cruise with my wife. We would start in Lisbon, Portugal and travel to Spain, Italy, Greece, and then end in Israel.
Was there a specific moment that made you say “You know, I should write a novel.”?
That moment hit me when I started reading a e-zine published by Randy Ingermanson aka The Snowflake Guy. His approach to writing a novel was very matter-of-fact, and I continue to subscribe to his monthly newsletter because of the quality of information that he provides to both new and experienced authors.
So did you actually use the snowflake method when writing The Fallen Body?
I did not use the snowflake method when writing The Fallen Body. Instead, I created a series of action scenes — about twenty or so — that outlined the general plot, and then wrote those scenes one right after the other. I created transitional scenes in between when needed and weaved them all together.
Tell me about The Fallen Body.
The Fallen Body is about a small-town lawyer, Taylour Dixxon, who meets Sarah Cockrell Baines, a New Jersey socialite and millionairess. Their budding friendship begins with promise. However, soon after they meet, Sarah is arrested for the murder of her husband. When Taylour volunteers to defend Sarah, she has no idea that her struggling solo law practice in the sleepy, fictional, small town of Marlinsville, Texas, will be turned upside down. From a lovable, adolescent nephew who moves in with her, to a hired assassin who is determined to hide the truth, and a handsome Texas Ranger who becomes the object of affection in a love triangle between the two friends, Taylour’s life will never be the same.
So what is next for you as a writer?
I am going to continue the Taylour Dixxon series with at least two more books, one of which I have already started. My goal is to have the second one done by October 2014 so that I can start the third during NaNoWriMo in November 2014.
What should I have asked, if only I had known you well enough to ask?
Q: Is there a message in your novel that you want readers to grasp?
The book starts out focusing on the death of Neil Baines, and how a small-town lawyer, Taylour Dixxon, found herself defending the wife, who is the one accused of perpetrating the crime. I chose a small-town lawyer because I wanted to highlight the challenges that these sole practitioners face, day in and day out, as they try to practice law outside of the big city. The message that I want the reader to come away with is that the job of a lawyer, especially in a small town, is vitally important to the sustainability of order in society. It can sometimes be a thankless job, but in the end, Taylour knows that this is where she belongs.
For more about Stone Patrick & The Fallen Body:
Today I have an interview with Daniel Danser, Author of “The God Particle.”
What are three things about yourself you think everybody should know?
The inspiration for The God Particle came after a business trip to Geneva, Switzerland. I was winding down after a hard days work in the hotel bar when I overheard two technicians from the nearby CERN Institute discussing the Hadron Collider. On the television were the devastating scenes of the 2011 Japanese tsunami. I put the two together, which formed the plot for the book.
Whilst doing my research for the novel I came up against a lot of resistance from the scientific community when I started asking poignant questions, such as: How can we be sure that the recent spate of so-called natural disasters aren’t as a result of something we are doing? Has humanity reached a tipping point of developing technology so profound, that it can destroy the human race? What if the motives for scientific discovery are not necessarily for the benefit of mankind?
Which brings me to my third point; I discovered that the search for the God Particle has already cost the contributing countries $15 billion. Putting that into perspective NASA cut their space exploration program to save $310 million that’s a third of what CERN spend every year on running costs for the Large Hadron Collider. So what are they going to do when they find the God Particle? The last time such a vast amount of money was spent on a single project by so many countries was in 1943, it was codenamed The Manhattan Project and the outcome was the atomic bomb! Need I say any more?
What is one thing almost nobody knows?
What almost nobody knows about me is that since I published The God Particle, I have been threatened and intimidated to such an extent that I have felt compelled, for the safety of my family, to leave my home country and relocate to the relative anonymity of The Middle East…and of course Daniel Danser isn’t my real name!
Hope it’s not too heavy for you but the more people who know the truth, the safer I will be.
Do you come from a scientific profession, or did you start this as a writer looking for good ideas?
I’ve always been interested in science – ever since my first chemistry set as a child. It was my best subject at school and I’ve always kept abreast of the latest developments by reading scientific journals. I’m sure that if I hadn’t taken up writing as a profession, the lure of the Bunsen burner, white lab coat and wild hair would have got me in the end.
You obviously feel pretty strongly about the dangers of some scientific research. Why write about them in a novel rather than pursue a more journalistic venue?
When I left university I worked in the newspaper industry and the sad truth is that stories get manipulated and edited for the benefit of the media owners. The great advantage of ebooks is that you can express your opinions without fear of censorship and get your message over to a global audience.
The other downside of newspapers is their transient nature; a ‘big’ story will hit the headlines for one day, if it gets enough response there may be a follow-up article the next day but then that’s it. It will inevitably get replaced by the next ‘big’ story, such is our appetite for new news. An ebook on the other hand is more enduring, once published its out there for future generations to discover.
Don’t get me wrong, “The God Particle” isn’t the gospel according to Daniel Danser, it’s a work of science fiction based on science fact; an action-adventure thriller that takes the popular theory – “Every time the world’s largest machine (the Large Hadron Collider), fires-up, a so-called ‘natural’ disaster occurs – tsunami, earthquake volcanic eruption etc” – to the next level. The hypothesis has been around for a while, I’ve just added the flesh to the bones in a way that I hope will entertain as well as inform.
So what is “The God Particle” all about?
CERN’s Hadron Collider is the world’s most powerful machine; its sole purpose is to prove the existence of the mysterious God Particles – the essential building blocks of the universe. But after a series of global catastrophes, suspicion arises as to whether they are occurring naturally or are somehow connected to the collider’s experiments.
After the sudden death of the project’s director general, professor of physics at Massachusetts Institute of Technology, Tom Halligan, is headhunted by CERN’s governing council to continue the search for the elusive particles.
He is soon embroiled in a titanic struggle against sinister forces that are intent on creating a chain of events, the outcome of which will determine the fate of mankind.
The battle to save the planet from annihilation is being fought by the most unlikely of heroes.
What did you do to help your book crack the Amazon top 30 for its category?
I knew from the outset that writing a good novel was only the beginning of the journey to becoming a best seller. When you put your pen down that’s when the real work start. You have to have a marketing strategy that will differentiate your book from the millions that are available, this involves using all the tools that are available on the web – blogging, interviews, online reviewers, facebook, twitter, youtube and of course your own website.
What is next for you as a writer?
People who have read my book are saying that they can’t wait for the sequel and as tempting as it is to sit down and write my next novel, I’m disciplined enough to know that you have to maintain the momentum generated by the current one, otherwise it could slip into oblivion. So more blogging, more interviews and more tweets. Ultimately I would like to see the book turned into a film but that’s a whole new skill-set I have to learn to attract the right people in the film industry, having said that, I am a quick learner.
What should I have asked you if only I had known you well enough to ask?
Good question – I suppose you should have asked me when my birthday was, so you could have sent me a card (it was last week by-the-way). If I were interviewing myself, I would ask, “What drives you as a writer?” and the simple answer would be to make people think about what’s really going on around them. I’ve already spoken about how certain people have reacted to the novel and if I can inspire others to ask the same questions that I have asked then maybe when there’s enough of us we will get the answers.
To learn more about Daniel Danser:
Today I’m pleased to introduce William M Brandon III. He just released a new novel called SILENCE and was kind enough to spend some time trading emails with me.
What are three things you think everybody should know about you?
- I’m a Los Angeles ex-pat, having escaped to the simpler life in NE Georgia. My recent move w/ my Wife and our six-year-old son is the 56th time I’ve changed addresses in my life.
- I prefer to write on typewriters.
- I began SILENCE when I was 19 years old (I am currently 38)
What is one thing almost nobody knows?
I love the Peaches’ album “Teaches of Peaches”
56 moves is a lot. You’re probably pretty good at it by now.
Very good; prior to meeting my wife I had my worldly possessions down to three boxes and my typewriters. Less is always more in that regard.
Do you have plans to settle down there in Georgia?
We are definitely very settled. We plan to stay here until our little man graduates from school, then the Wife and I may skip the country for a little while.
Okay, I’m intrigued by the typewriters thing. Do you have one at home that you use to do the first draft or something?
I have several: a Burroughs (of adding Machine fame), a Olivetti Lettera 22,1923 Remington Portable, 1966 Smith-Corona, and an Olympia SM-4. The Olympia is the only fully functioning typer at present, although the Lettera is very close and so is the Smith-Corona. When I start a long project I like to start on a typewriter because it prohibits me from editing the hell out of everything I write. Using a typewriter helps me put together a body of work to edit, rather than editing to death a few pages and paragraphs which I inevitably do on a laptop. My first attempt at a novel (SILENCE) was written long hand on legal pads at first – my desktop typing was far slower than my printing. While I was taking the initial parts of SILENCE and putting them together, my company performed an office product purge and I took home a late 80s electric typewriter. I loved being able to produce sheets of writing rapidly, and I have a deep nostalgia for the use of typewriters as a means of collecting ideas and thoughts. However, when it comes to editing a 300 page manuscript, I’m a big advocate of the laptop!
Are there aftermarket parts available for those old typewriters, or do you have to search thrift and antique stores?
No sir, it’s all cannibalism now; weak machines have to be sacrificed to keep the strong ones going. For 70s/80s machines there is a dwindling supply of parts, but prior to that your best hope is to find a cheap typewriter on eBay, an antique store, or an estate sale and use it for spare parts. People also become creative, e.g. degradation of the piece of rubber surrounding the platen is a very common issue with antique typers. Industrial rubber isn’t manufactured on the level it once was, so collectors developed ways of stripping wires and taking their coating and applying it to typewriter platens…voila! The outland areas of Hollywood, like Burbank, and North Hollywood are excellent for typewriter shopping: all of the old movie props flow through the second-hand and antique stores and are usually in good enough condition. There is also a full typewriter repair and restoration shop in Glassell Park, California, but I haven’t found its equivalent in Georgia.
Any other hobbies besides writing and typewriters?
Have you been writing SILENCE on and off this whole time, or is it something that you just put away for a while and recently dug back out and finished up?
I stopped working on it in 2000, aside from correcting an occasional spelling or grammatical error, it remained untouched until last year. That made the project very interesting: since SILENCE I’ve written several novels, and a bevy of short stories, so my writing has changed, refined I hope. I decided to send the manuscript to my editor, Elise Portale, as unchanged as possible from the 2000 version. Elise did a superb job of challenging me to develop many underdeveloped parts of the plot and to further develop the characters. Making changes, edits and additions in my old “voice” was a lot of fun and less paradigm-shifting than I had feared. I consider the manuscript done now, prior to completing the novella for Black Hill Press it felt unfinished to say the least.
So give me the elevator pitch for SILENCE.
Plus, if you’re in the area, you can catch William doing book signings this month at Hendershot’s in Athens, Ga, on April 16th (http://hendershotscoffee.com/event/silence-by-william-bill-m-brandon-iii-book-signing-and-reading/) and at Book Soup in Los Angeles on May 16th (http://agentofdiscord.com/book-soup-los-angeles-may-16th/)
“Many a yarn has been woven around the quest for love. But that familiar tale starts to fray at the edges when young Dean O’Leary, a bank robber whose pinstripe suit is a better fit than the age in which he lives, packs up his cigarettes and his battered heart to start fresh in Las Vegas. With a voice and style that drag you in, Brandon sets up a character whose neurotic, mile-a-minute mind echoes the desire, anxiety, depression, and insanity found at every intersection on the road to love. From Dean’s ultimate highs to his rock-bottom lows (making a quick pit-stop at the surreal), Brandon will take you on an emotional walk in a desperate man’s wing-tip shoes—and you’ll be hooked from the very first step.”-Elise Portale
I wrote this as an entry to Bruce Schneier’s Seventh Movie-Plot Threat Contest. I guess that makes it a movie I will never write, then. But you never know, as I already have a bunch of outlines for a political thriller / hacker series. If that ever happens, this may get worked into something.
A plucky young hacker is hired by a freshman senator after he receives an encrypted blackmail message signed by his contact at a major campaign-contributing corporation. She doesn’t care about the politics, only her fee. He is being blackmailed for information that he thought was stored securely on his computer. He says she needs to be careful, and she shows him the stun gun in her purse.
She buys him a brand new laptop, and within hours she notices it sending out packets of information. The computer must have spyware that no vendor is catching. That night a scary man breaks into the senator’s office, steals something valuable and implants a tiny hardware device in the new laptop. She follows him out, but loses him outside near an NSA office.
She social engineers her way into the contact’s office at the corporation. While she is there, his computer receives an encrypted message from the senator with the subject “For the right price…” On her way out of the office she glimpses the scary man in a crowd.
Back with the senator, she learns not only that he didn’t send the email she saw, but that he received another threat email from the computer she was using- while she was using it.
Upon further research, she finds a lot of network traffic heading to and from the senator’s machine to the NSA office she saw before. Using a packet capturing device, she is able to discover that the NSA office is transferring huge amounts of data with the big NSA facility in Utah, but the data is all encrypted.
She breaks into the NSA office, and figures out what is going on. The NSA is using the senator as a honeypot against the corporation, and the corporation as a blackmailer against the senator. This is done automatically, and without human interaction. It knows what will work best, and it knows how to mimic everybody’s communication patterns, due to the ubiquitous data harvesting. It knows everyone’s encryption keys and sensitive data due to trojan spyware and hardware devices. It is not just the senator and the corporation being manipulated either. It is thousands of people, maybe millions – anyone with power or money. Before she collects hard evidence or installs a backdoor, the scary man shows up and almost kills her.
She reports to the senator, who is obviously conflicted over something. He fires her and pleads with her to stay away. She argues with him, having decided the money isn’t important after all. As she leaves the senator’s office the scary man attacks her. She manages to stun him, then grab the gun he drops. She shoots him as he charges. She steals his NSA ID and uses it to enter the NSA office, where she uses mad hacking skills to destroy the automatic people-controlling system.
Two weeks later, she is approached by another politician saying he’s received an encrypted blackmail message signed by his contact at a major labor union.
I know that this is random, but I came upon this problem for a project at work. Googling it led me to a bunch of commercial solutions and non-useful resources. I wanted at least one useful article to have a chance in the search engines.
Here was my Problem
I have many directories of wav files that in the old days were used to create a CD set which we sold. We haven’t sold the CD course for several years now, and the boss recently said “Let’s release the whole shebang for free as a podcast or something.” I could go through and convert and tag all the wav files to mp3s and then post them separately. But I’m lazy and some of the 18 or so CDs have over 20 tracks. How much easier would it be if I could just combine one CD’s worth of material into a single track?
This is pretty straightforward to do in Audacity, but I would still have to import all those tracks and line them up end to end. I wanted something a little more automated. What I found was a command line tool called sox. Sox is cross platform, so you can do this on Win/Mac/Linux, although my comments will be directed specifically for the windows crowd.
Now to The Useful Part
- Download & install sox (Sound Exchange) Make sure you put sox on your “path.” If you don’t know how to do that, here’s one walkthrough.
- Download & unzip the LAME mp3 Encoder into the sox directory. On that download page, I used the x86-Win32 version. You’ll need this if you are working with mp3 files.
- Put a bunch of audio files that you want to merge into a directory.
- Open a command window in that directory. If you are in the windows file explorer, you go can hold down shift while right clicking on a folder. “Open command window here” will appear on the pop up menu.
- Type the sox command.
sox input_file_name_1.wav input_file_name_2.wav [... more input file names] output_file_name.mp3
Now let sox do it’s magic. My files were already conveniently named in the order I wanted them in the merged file, so I could use
sox *.wav output.mp3
Note: if you have a lot of files, this will take a while. Just have faith that your prompt will eventually come back.
You can do a lot more with sox if you want the output mp3 to have different-than-the-default quality and bit rate. You can also boost volume and do all sorts of other processing. All of that, however is beyond the scope of this post.
There, now I only have to tag 18 files rather than spend a whole day doing it.
Oh, and if you’re at all curious as to the project I’m doing, it’s a real estate investment training course. I’ll start posting the audio files within a day or two.
If you are wondering where I’ve gone this time, I just posted a little update on my other blog.
I like the idea of bitcoins for several reasons.
- The cryptography and peer-to-peer basis for it appeal to my nerd self.
- The anonymous and unregulated nature of it appeals to my libertarian self.
- The feeless transactions appeal to my business self.
That’s not so say I’m switching any real portion of my finances to bitcoins. Sure, I love the ideas behind it, but there are wild swings in the dollar to bitcoin exchange rate, so I’m a little bit weary of exchanging cash for bitcoins at MtGox or any of the other exchanges.
However, I have a couple of novels with all the rights, so I figured “Why not just sell my ebooks for some bitcoin?” After all, it shouldn’t cost me anything, and I might get some new readers to boot. And if I do sell a few copies, maybe I’ll be able to buy something awesome at the Bitcoin Store.
If you’d like to join me in trying out bitcoins without risking your dollars, here’s how to get started.
The first step is to get a bitcoin wallet. You can think of a bitcoin wallet as a bank account where you’ll get paid. You have a bunch of options. Here’s a list of wallets
For what it’s worth, I started with the Blockchain Browser Extension
Bitcoin eBook Stores
If you’ve self published at other places, you probably have epub, mobi, and pdf versions of your book. Put them in a zip file. That way whoever buys your book will get it in a format he can use. Make you you tell people in your product descriptions exactly what they’re getting.
Now it’s time to check out the places where you can list your book. There’s only a couple of stores at this point. Only one seems to actually work, and that’s http://coindl.com. There’s also http://www.bitbooks.co, but it’s not quite production ready yet.
CoinDL is a general digital goods marketplace. They sell music, software, ebooks, and such. It isn’t well organized for authors, and the eBooks section currently has no subcategories. I’m certain as their catalog grows they’ll gave to fix that.
To get going, you need to first sign up for an account, then apply to become a vendor.
Sometimes it takes them a while. It took about 3 weeks for them to approve my application. Then once you upload your book, you have to wait for them to review your file. One good thing is that you can set the base price of your book in US dollars. The site then figures out what to charge the customer based on the current exchange rate. With the volatility in that rate, this is a good thing.
Like I said, There are a couple of other ebook stores out there, but I think they need to work out some technical issues before they will really work.
Fortunately, there is another way to go about it…
Sell it Yourself.
You can do this the old fashioned way by having buyers send money to your bitcoin wallet and then you manually send them an email with your book. That seems like a lot of work, though. Unless you only plan on selling one book a month, you probably want to automate the process.
I looked around and found some possible solutions.
- Universal Digital Shop
- WordPress + WooCommerce + Bitcoin Payments for WooCommerce. (You’ll need an Electrum Wallet for this one)
- BTC File
Here’s the deal with the first three: I’m not going to walk you through using them (at least today.) If you’re nerdy enough to even want this, you probably don’t need my help. And you’ll need to be very comfortable installing software on your own website to do these.
Numbers 4 and 5 are easier and require no software installation. They are general solutions for selling any digital file, so they’ll work for ebooks just fine.
I listed Oasis at Satoshi Box. It took like 20 seconds. You can see it here. It’s a one screen setup process. Super easy. If you then go to that sales page from the same computer you used to upload the file, you’ll have access to some editing features.
- Super easy to set up.
- There is a built-in affiliate system (also easy to use.)
- You can delete your file if you need to.
- There’s a page to see some basic stats (hits and purchases).
- Currently free to use.
- You can’t change the price of your book.
- You have to upload your file again to a new “box” with a new price, then go to your old one and set it to forward to your new “box”.
- The system to edit your file is way insecure. It just checks to see if your computer is the one that uploaded the file, and then gives you editing access. Never upload anything from a public computer.
- Also, the sales page is rather plain, and you can’t add any description or images, just a title.
- It provides no way for a customer to find your book. there’s no browsing or categories or search or anything. You have to drive all traffic to it yourself.
BTC File is a service similar to Satoshi Box. It can be used to sell any digital file you want. I uploaded The Journey of St. Laurent here Again, start to finish, it took less than a minute.
- You can set the price based on whichever currency you want, and that amount will be converted to bitcoin when a user visits your purchase link.
- You can edit the price anytime.
- Setup is super easy, just drop a file onto the form, then set the price and your bitcoin address.
- All someone would need is your edit url to change the price or commandeer the payment address. Protect that edit url at least as well as you would any password. Also, save that url or you’ll never be able to edit anything. There is no way for you to recover it if you lode it.
- There is no title or description of your book that a buyer sees. They only see the name of the file you uploaded.
- It provides no way for a customer to find your book. there’s no browsing or categories or search or anything. You have to drive all traffic to it yourself.
Well, there you have it. Now you can get started earning some bitcoin.
And maybe some weekend if there’s any interest I’ll put up some kind of directory for BTC File and Satoshi Box uploaded ebooks.
Okay, so have you heard about the crazy ant problem in Texas? It makes me itch all over just to think about them. Go read that article. I’ll wait here.
Here’s the second bit of ant-related bizarreness: Zombie ants.
Here’s the story idea that I will never have time to write. You’re welcome to it, although I suspect that you as a writer already have too many of your own ideas as it is.
The idea for the story’s milieu is the intersection of those two news items. Crazy ants invade and spread so much that whole town are being abandoned. The human population shifts itself ever northward. Traditionally exterminating the ants becomes a problem: the colonies are just too strong and they spread too quick. So some genius comes up with the right strategy. She thinks, “You know what we need? We need a pesticide that spreads itself.” She sets herself to making the zombie ant fungus capable of targeting the crazy ants. Problem solved, right? It would be, except that in her zest to make the fungus more potent or capable of spread, now the fungus can infect humans.
Queue the creepy music.
As a side note, scientists seem to think that both of these oddities have their origin in Brazil. So here’s an eco-bonus addendum to the idea: Maybe it’s the rain forest fighting back…
Also, if you’re a scientist, you should totally get on creating pesticides that spread themselves. Bacterias, viruses (virii?), or fungi, it doesn’t matter. Some may call this field of study biological warfare, but I say it’s just pest control. Once you nail this, you’ll be Soros-Gates-Koch-Walton rich. What could possibly go wrong?
I reformatted and updated the paperback version of Oasis so that the paperback cover now matches the (much better) ebook cover. It’s available on Amazon now.
I also got things set up for The Journey of St. Laurent, but as I looked over my proof copy, I noticed a typo on the back cover. Oops. Now I need to wait out the review process again, and order a new proof.
For both, I used Createspace’s new matte cover. Let me tell you, the glossy covers don’t look bad, but the matte ones look great.
Over the weekend I published the ebook version of The Journey of St. Laurent. I started the whole process Saturday night with a plain text manuscript. About an hour later, I was done. As in done submitting the proper files to three different stores. Each website took whatever time it needed verifying my submission (all had done so by Sunday night, with one half exception) The novel is currently available here:
- Amazon: The Journey of St. Laurent
- Barnes & Noble: The Journey of St. Laurent
- Smashwords: The Journey of St. Laurent
Gee, Bryce, how did you do it so fast?
I did not have to sign up for new accounts at any of the three places, so that did save me an extra hour of waiting for confirmation emails and looking up banking information. Also, I pre-wrote the book description and other info that I was going to need when filling out publishing forms.
The secret, then, to self publishing quickly is automation.
As I’ve discussed before, I primarily use plain text editors and I format the text as I write using markdown. For fiction, this mostly means putting a “#” before chapter titles and then wrapping words/phrases that I want italicized with asterisks. So it’s not like it’s a lot of extra work or anything.
But since my novel was in markdown, and I’ve had a cover ready for almost a year now, there was very little to do.
First, I used SPAB to produce the epub for Barnes and Noble. (Yes, SPAB produces a bunch of other files that can be used, but I wanted to be extra picky about formatting.)
Second, I used Amazon’s Kindle Previewer to convert both the epub mentioned above and the zipped html (produced by SPAB) to mobi, then I picked the one that looked the best to me. That mobi went to Amazon.
Third, I used pandoc along with templates I made for the old version of SPAB to make a LibreOffice odt file. I opened LibreOffice and saved it as a word doc. The word doc got uploaded to Smashwords.
In all fairness, I probably could have just used SPAB and been done with it. However, the file that SPAB produces for Smashwords is an epub. Smashwords will take an epub, but it won’t convert that epub to the ten or so other formats it likes to sell. The book was for sale at Smashwords itself very quickly, but is still pending review to be distributed everywhere Smashwords distributes. That’s the half exception.
Still, the files I needed were ready to go within 15 minutes. Then it was a matter of uploading and filling in forms.
But writing is still hard
Publishing the book was a snap. And even if you don’t use the same method or tools I do, it is still pretty easy. But do you know what wasn’t easy? Writing the thing. Also: editing it.
I’m confident this is a much stronger novel than the last one, but the more I write, the more I recognize my writing weaknesses.
Anyway, the tools to self publish will continue to get better and easier. That only means we writers should spend the extra time bettering our craft.
Okay, I’ve done several “last” editing passes on the Journey of St. Laurent. I’m pretty happy with the end result. Also, if I don’t quit now, I’ll never finish editing it.
Over the next couple of days I’m going to password protect the posts that make up the final 2/3 of the first draft. Within a day or so after that, the ebook versions should start appearing in Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Smashwords. Paperback to follow in the next couple of weeks.
After I set those things in motion, I’ll be updating Oasis. I added a new first chapter and combed out a couple of lingering typos. The paperback cover is also going to change to match the ebook cover.
And then I’d like to finish up some of the projects I have lying around – the fairy tale book, the “how to self publish” site, at least on of the short stories I’ve started.
I finished going over Dane’s suggested edits a little while ago. He helped me out tremendously. Go buy his books. I cut a ton of fat from the story. Like 20,000 words worth. The book just came back from yet another editor, who was searching for typos and major inconsistencies. It should only take a day or two to go over them.
After that, I may very well be ready to prep the thing for publishing.
NaNoWriMo is upon us again. I don’t think I’ll be trying to hammer out a novel, but maybe I’ll finish up that kid’s book I’ve been sitting on.
As I’ve been planning my next project, I’ve been thinking (again) about the various storytelling frameworks that I’ve come across. Many of these contain similar concepts, but I think all are different enough to be useful.
So without further ado, and in no particular order, here are five of my favorite teachings on story planning.
Dan Harmon’s Story Circles
Dan Harmon is the creator of the TV show “Community.” This borrows heavily from Christopher Vogler’s “The Writer’s Journey,” which in turn borrows from Joseph Campbell’s “Hero Journey.”
- Story Structure 101
- Story Structure 102
- Story Structure 103
- Story structure 104
- Story Structure 105
- Story Structure 106
Story Structure (Larry Brooks)
Larry’s written several novels and integrates lots of storytelling ideas from the screenwriting world.
- Story Structure — Just Possibly the Holy Grail of Storytelling
- Introducing the Four Parts of Story
- Milestones Along the 4 Part Storytelling Road
- Five Missions for the Set-up of Your Story
- The First Plot Point
- Part 2 – The Response
- Wrapping Your Head Around the Mid-Point Milestone
- The Part 3 Attack
- The Second Plot Point
- Pinch Points
- The Final Act
- Epilogue… the Fine Print
- The Single Most Powerful Writing Tool You’ll Ever See that Fits on One Page
5 Act Structure (a la Shakespeare, via Film Crit Hulk)
It’s no secret. I love Film Crit Hulk. His all-caps manifestos are fantastic.
Jim Butcher Style Planning
Jim Butcher pens fantasy novels. He has plenty of writing street cred, with 20 novels published, also had a TV series made from one of his series. He has a (apparently now-defunct) livejournal where he used to lay down some of his thoughts on writing. The part that deals with planning a story is actually the last one “Putting it all Together.”
- Story Craft
- Conflict, Logical Response and Point of View
- Story Skeletons
- The Great Swampy Middle
- Story Climax
- Putting It all Together
The Snowflake Method
This was my first introduction to story planning/structure of any kind. It’s an excellent way to write a novel.
I built some little templates to help me out when I’m planning a new story.
Here they are in two formats: plain text and as a WriteMonkey plugin. You’ll have to make a donation to WriteMonkey to unlock the plugins ability, but I think it’s worth it.
- Story Planning Worksheets - Zipped .txt files
- Story Planning Templates - Zipped WriteMonkey plugin. Just unzip the file then copy the “Story Planner Templates” folder into your WriteMonkey’s (ver 1.5+) “plugins” folder. Next time you start WriteMonkey, hit Ctrl+F10 to insert the story planning text. I like to insert it into the repository so I can use it like a story bible.
I just put up a page for my latest little piece of software on my other blog. It’s for writing and formatting audio drama scripts. Check it out: AudioScripter
And for any of you that care, I now have 2 chapters left to edit in the Journey of St. Laurent.
Again, I have started too many projects. I really need to focus on one at a time until they’re done. I guess I did finish the theme update.
Anyway, I haven’t forgotten Journey of St. Laurent. It’s just that editing is such hard work. Sometime this week I’ll dive back into it.
I’m also going to try hard to curtail the number of programming side projects so I can focus on the fiction writing. That being said, I do have another piece of freeware ready to be released as soon as I write up some kind of introduction to it. It’s for writing audio drama scripts, which I’m currently into (again.)
Film Crit Hulk is awesome. If you can get past the ALL-CAPS SHOUTING, then you’ll read some of the best storytelling advice on the internet. For instance, I was blown away by this recent post:
My Favorite Takeaway, aka TL;DR
For every major character in your story, you should know (and your reader, too) the answers to the following 7 questions:
- What does this character want?
- What does this character need?
- How do those wants and needs conflict with each other within the character?
- How do they conflict with the outside world?
- How do they conflict with other characters?
- How does the character change through those conflicts and how does the resolution affect them?
- What impact does that change have on everyone else?
You start your story by showing the reader the answers to the first two questions early on. That way your audience knows what they’re rooting for. They can experience tension as they wait to find out if the character gets what he wants. The conflicts that result are the meat of your story.
Anyway, this is why I don’t really write about writing that often: I’d just look like a dork next to Hulk.
I love index cards. I have a stack of them on my desk at all times. I carry a few with me at all times. I use them for all sorts of things.
Last weekend I was obsessed with an idea. What if there was an app out there where I could use virtual index cards to plan out my writing? There are a few programs out there for keeping digital note cards, but none of them really hit the sweet spot for me. For example, I already own a copy of scrivener. Yes, it has it’s cork board index card view – and that works great. However, I often crave simpler programs, especially when I’m just batting around ideas. I don’t want a zillion colors or copious amounts of meta data about each card. I just want to add / edit/ rearrange cards. Maybe get out a text file out when I’m done.
Well, I’m a nerd, so you can guess what happened next.
Yep, I built my own.
It’s a web-based application and it is about as simple as I could think to make it while still being useful.
Go check it out.
On facebook there’s an event happening today called the Zombie Fest Free eBook Bonanza! There are lots and lots of giveaways of ebooks, artwork, and other stuff. Every ten minutes something is being given way.
Anyway, sometime during the day (not sure when) a couple of copies of Oasis are going to be awarded. edit: Oasis is going to be free for anyone who wants it, you just need to find the link when you get there.
So if you’re into zombies, go check it out.
In other news…
So much for my early April release of Journey of St. Laurent. My buddy Dane did an editing pass for me, and made a ton of good suggestions. Yes, I want to be done with the book and move on, but I’d also like for it not to suck. So hang in there just a little longer.
Yes, I have project ADD. It doesn't help that I have some programming knowledge. Every time I want a piece of software and I can't immediately find exactly what I want, I start making my own. I have hard drives filled with half finished projects.
A little while ago I was digging through some of these old project ideas and I came across the framework for a very simple dream journal. I wrote it intending for it to be released for android and iOS via phonegap.
I hit a technical problem at the time that I could never get straightened out, so I got bored and set it aside.
Fast forward a year or so, and I decided it would be pretty straightforward to make it work on the desktop instead. A couple of days later, I had it working.
If that sort of thing interests you, go check it out: Free Dream Journal Software
I’m putting the final touches on The Journey of St. Laurent, and I thought I’d share what I’ve ended up with as a cover. I may end up tweaking the text a little more, but maybe not.
I’m pretty excited. Adam Masterman painted this one for me as well as the one for Oasis.
Also, if anybody out there is interested in reading the packaged up Journey to help me comb for typos, please let me know. I’d be forever grateful. Just leave a comment on this post, or shoot me an email if you have my address. Or tweet at me.
What Happens Next?
Well, once this goes live on Amazon et al, I’m going to be locking up most of the chapters here on the site. I know that’s a huge bummer for some of you, but I have given it a lot of thought, and that’s just the way it’s going to be. I’m also going to be republishing Oasis soon, with the new first chapter, and I’ll finally get the paperback cover to match the ebook cover. It’s likely I’ll be setting a password for most of the Oasis posts as well.
Then next project I’ll be polishing up will be the “How to Self Publish a Book” book. Once that is over, I’ll go back to fiction, and try to stay focused on it for a while. All my side programming and design projects are fun, but when I look back, I realize I have enjoyed story writing more.
What is SPAB!?
At long last I’m posting a new version of SPAB! For those not in the know, SPAB! is a simple utility for authors to take a markdown-formatted book and transform it into quality-formatted, ready-to-publish files that can be uploaded to kdp.amazon.com, smashwords, and the like.
Here’s what SPAB! now produces:
- An epub file to be used at Barnes and Noble’s pubit, and just about anyone else that’ll take an epub.
- A smashwords specific epub.
- A zipped html file to be used at kdp.amazon.com.
- An 8.5 x 11 printable pdf.
- A 5.5 x 8.5 pdf for paperback interior at createspace, lulu, shopmybook, or lightning source.
I need some help testing this, making sure that the files produced actually work at the various self publishing sites, and making sure that the output looks good. And of course I”m open to any other suggestions as well. If find any issues you can contact me by commenting here, or shooting me an email “bryce at storyhack.com”
Bugs that I Know About
Bold and italics are not always working correctly in the pdf outputs. Fixed in the 3.0.1 Beta Book interior images not always working in the epubs. (cover is working fine)Fixed in the 3.0.1 Beta
So you know exactly how to use SPAB!, I’ve written up a couple of tutorials as part of my online book on self-publishing. Sorry, for now you’re on your own for creating a cover.
- What is Markdown?
- Getting your book into markdown
- Preparing your Markdown-flavored book file to use in SPAB!
After that you just open up SPAB!, select your book file, then click publish.
Note: Make sure that your image references are correct if your book has pictures. Otherwise, SPAB! will just freeze with no indication that something has gone wrong. Someday I may build in useful error messages. Today is not that day. Stop whining, this is free software.
Download SPAB! v3.0.1 Beta now (Windows Only – 4.7 mb)
What? Windows only? But I’m a super-hip Apple addict!
Now, for you pobrezinhos who don’t have a windows machine – this has been written with cross-platform functionality in mind using the python programming language. Someday I will make you a mac installer, and probably go ahead and release the source code. Today is not that day.
If you find this little program useful and you wish to see development continue, or you just want to say thanks, feel free to leave me a tip via the donate button below.
You know all those celebrities that get plastic surgery over and over? Sometimes I feel like that’s me with the theme of this blog. I can’t help myself. Every few months, it seems like, I have this uncontrollable urge to tweak my theme. If I give in to this temptation, this tweaking always turns into a total site redesign and rebuild from the ground up.
Anyway, that’s what happened here last week.
Two or three hours that could have been spent actually writing have been lost forever, but at least I have a new theme. But just check out how neat and responsive it is! Go ahead, go and resize your browser window. Make it skinny and then full screen. Stop rolling your eyes at me. It’s awesome.
If you see anything that looks unreadable or out of place, please let me know.
You know, so I can tweak it.
In other news, I think by Friday I’ll be ready to post something real about the new SPAB! If I’m lucky I’ll also be done with my edits to The Journey of St. Laurent. I’ll ask if there’s any of you that want to help me track down any typos.
I’m getting so close. I can’t wait to start completing my long list of works-in-progress.